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We took the BNI membership pledge to be “positive and supportive.” Yet, each chapter has at least one negative person: an “Eeyore Vampire.”

Pooh, Piglet, and Tigger would plan a wonderful play day for Christopher Robin, but upon hearing their idea, Eeyore invariably would complain, “Oh Pooh…It’ll never work.”

Got a member like that?

But he’s more than an Eeyore. When you leave the meeting, you think more about what he said. He sucks up your time, energy and attention, which could be used positively for creating referrals. He’s also a vampire.

So how do you attract more positive and supportive members—and fewer Eeyore Vampires—to your group?

Practice the five key traits of positive and supportive BNI members:

Listen
In the movie Pulp Fiction, one of the characters asks, “Are you really listening, or just waiting to talk?”

It’s a powerful question we should all ask ourselves. Positive and supportive BNI members listen intently to each presentation. They take good notes during 1-to-1s. They listen to more than words by observing body language. They work to understand their fellow member’s business so they have a clear picture of ideal clients and customers.

Be Humble
If you know NASCAR, I’ll bet you can name at least one driver. But can you name a tire changer? These guys only get their names called when a lug nut is left loose and the driver is penalized. Yet their performance is essential to the team’s success.

Be humble enough when participating in your chapter meeting or during a 1-to-1 to give others time to talk about themselves. Being positive and supportive means you realize that the business needs of others are just as important as your own.

Practice Mutual Benefit
I bought a bird feeder called “The Absolute,” made with a counterweight device that shuts the feeder door when anything heavier than a bird—like a squirrel—lights on the feeder. But squirrels have defeated this most ingenious device by teaming up with one another. While one squirrel stands on the counterweight bar behind the feeder, thereby keeping the front door from shutting, the other squirrel stands on the roost and feeds. Then they switch places.

These squirrels understand mutual benefit. Your chapter members can also as they pass referrals to one another. This trait is the most important in attracting new, positive and supportive members to your chapter. Everyone wants to belong to a group rooted in mutual benefits.

Be Accountable
A rubber band has a shape of its own until you stretch it to put it around a deck of cards. Then it assumes the shape the pressure puts on it to become useful in holding the cards together.

Each BNI chapter holds its members to certain standards, such as attendance requirements, to put pressure on them to be most useful to the group. We hold one another accountable to be at our best.

You attract positive and supportive members who desire accountability so they can become their best.

Embrace the Golden Rule
Positive and supportive BNI members know the Golden Rule works so they work the Golden Rule. Practice Givers Gain® and attract more Golden Rule members to your chapter.

Dr. Ivan Misner, BNI Founder, says of Dr. Joey’s new book, Work Positive in a Negative World, “To apply the strategies in this book is to dramatically improve your business and life—period.  Dr. Joey’s insights into how to Work Positive in a Negative World provide a powerfully effective blueprint for achieving higher levels of success in all areas of your life, to the point where others will be specifically seeking you out because they want the chance to network with you!” Order Work Positive in a Negative World from Amazon.com.

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