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Is Your Network a Mile Wide and an Inch Deep?

Why it’s important to build a deep network.

By Dr. Ivan Misner

This marks the start of the 3^rd annual International Networking Week®. You may not know that international program was started by BNI and is now being celebrated all around the world. In honor of International Networking Week, I want to talk about creating a network that is both wide and deep.

In Southern California we have many huge, tall, lush eucalyptus trees that topple over fairly easily in the high winds that occur almost every year. When they're uprooted, you can see that their root system is broad and wide-but not very deep.

I think this is a powerful metaphor for what to consider in building your personal network. To go deep in establishing your network, you can do three things:

1. Build quality relationships. Take time beyond normal business interactions to deepen your relationships with referral sources. Invite them to social functions, learn their hobbies and interests, and help them pursue their personal goals.

2. Network in new places. Look for additional areas, outside of BNI, to find partners with common interests, such as Chambers, charitable organizations, and professional associations. Don't prospect right away; let the relationships mature.

3. Focus on others. Rather than having a "What's in it for me?" mind-set, develop a "What can I do for this person?" mentality. Continually look for ways to bring business and benefits to others in any group you're a part of. Become known as the person who always has something for others. This is a powerful way to both deepen and broaden your network.

If your network is a mile wide and an inch deep, it will not hold up in the winds of today's economy. Go deep in building relationships and you'll do well in these challenging times.

I'd love to hear your thoughts on this, so please leave a comment.

Called the “father of modern networking” by CNN, Dr. Ivan Misner is a New York Times bestselling author. He is the Founder and Chairman of BNI (www.bni.com), the world’s largest business networking organization. His latest #1 bestseller, The 29% Solution can be viewed at www.29PercentSolution.com. Dr. Misner is also the Senior Partner for the Referral Institute, an international referral training company (www.referralinstitute.com). He can be reached at misner@bni.com. Visit www.iLearningGlobal.tv/Networking for downloadable content by Dr. Misner.

Tags: February 2009 Edition, Ivan Misner, networking, relationships

31 Responses to “Is Your Network a Mile Wide and an Inch Deep?”

Christi Borden Says:
February 2nd, 2009 at 11:24 am
My philosophy has always been quality over quantity where networking is concerned. Yes, I belong to my Chamber and other large off-line and on-line communities, but it is my BNI networking that truly has the most value for time and money spent. We develop deep trenches rather than small ruts in the road and these relationships help not only build strong referrals but are long-lasting and truly satisfying connections.

I agree that in this current economy, it will be the deep networks that will prove to be the most effective resource for building and maintaining our businesses.
Bill Witkowski Says:
February 2nd, 2009 at 11:35 am
Hi, this was a note for a educational minute I did a while back.
2/26/07

Tree analogy –

Willow tree – has shallow root & gets blown over in the wind- you need to get your roots spread deep. The tree is top heavy.

Oak tree- has deep roots –rarely gets uprooted under stress

When you have your roots planted deep in the BNI system your business will have a strong base to stand on.

Like the crown of a large Oak tree your business will spread and grow.

Someday you’ll be able to sit in the shade & enjoy.

yes as you can guess-I am a landscaper
Bill Witkowski Best Won Chapter Cape Cod
Randy Moore Says:
February 2nd, 2009 at 11:37 am
I totally agree. I am trying to get upper management see the benefits of my involvement in charitable events. It must be heartfelt involvement and not just window dressing. My sales manager does not like that it sometimes occurs during work hours and sees no benefit unless it is a clear business call.
M. Ettisch-Enchelmaier, B.A., MSc. Says:
February 2nd, 2009 at 11:56 am
Dear Dr. Misner! 2/2/2009

It is a good thing that you introduced the
“International Networking Week”.

As I already told the German Executive Directors
Dembowski, now Mr. Barber, it is so difficult
even to get members of “local” or “regional”,
i.e. “neighboring” groups to interact. At the
most you meet one or another at workshops or
the like and that is that (only one time).

Enjoy the International Networking Week.

Sincerely,
the Editor of the International Business Calendar
M. Ettisch-Enchelmaier, B.A., MSc., Geschäftsführung, President, CEO
Ettisch-Enchelmaier GmbH, since 1972, HR# AG Ludwigshafen HRB 31454 GR
Bodelschwinghstr. 9/67246 Dirmstein/Germany, VAT/Steuer# DE 148418921
Tel. (+49 6238)989 098, Fax. (+49 6238)989099 + (+49 6238)1313
Author of a PI book: http://www.pimall.com/nais/successfulpi.html
ISBN: 1-891247-59-X
Kevin Smith Says:
February 2nd, 2009 at 11:57 am
I wholly agree with the idea that quality versus quantity. I have spoken to number of BNI memembers that tell me that referrals is their number one business (qualified lead) strategy. BNI works.

And yet they have room for more. BNI is good, but it has to be supplemented with other processes. So, if your marketing is based on one strategy, it could eventually fail. Business people like it, because it can overcome that awful rejection feeling we get. Get others, and remember to test and measure until it works.
Sydney Metrick Says:
February 2nd, 2009 at 12:03 pm
I was captivated by the title of this article and was surprised to find it was about something different than what I’d expected. An alternate interpretation could be applied to a dilettante-like approach to networking. This would be the person, like a “category hog” who does not have a business niche, but is involved professionally and personally in a number of groups, is not known for anything in particular and can’t connect the dots.
Nicole Bandes Says:
February 2nd, 2009 at 12:34 pm
I love this article. I fully grasp the principals illustrated here and hold it as a personal goal to encourage others to see this as well. I meet a lot of business people for “dance cards”, many of which are not currently in BNI. I’m amazed on a regular basis how much some of them will pay lip service to quality relationships but you never hear from them again after the initial meeting.
Jean MacDonald Says:
February 2nd, 2009 at 12:44 pm
I love this topic. For example on thursday I met with a Business Consultant (both of us had our gains profile)and I was able to connect him with a business coach in our BNI group. I gave him our coach’s card and then called the coach and also left him an email. I then called the business consultant to let him know what I had done. This really brings value to yourself and credibility to the people you are connecting. This takes time but brings so much value. I followed up with a Send Out Card to the consultant. The extra mile really works. They both have sent me connections that I know will be bentificial.
Dan Edwards Says:
February 2nd, 2009 at 1:00 pm
Great post, Dr. Misner! I have really enjoyed the relationships from BNI and felt the biggest difference was that the level of relationship is directly related to the quality of the referrals. Realizing also that some business professionals are just not looking for depth in their relationships, you have to expand your horizons. It is the exception not the rule that folks want to get to know you on a deeper level, it’s always best to reach out first.
Joyce Davis Says:
February 2nd, 2009 at 1:13 pm
Dr. Mr. Misner,

Thank you for your insightful article.

Surely, we’ve all seen those busy networkers at events, collecting business cards, and sizing up whether you’re a direct prospect for their business. Or, those who meet you, and immediately suggest ways you could help them, under the guise of a “mutually beneficial” connections. Or worse, you pass your cards at a BNI function, and suddenly you’re subscribed to a stranger’s enewsletter. All of these are those annoying symptoms of going wide, not deep.
Chris Anderson Says:
February 2nd, 2009 at 1:29 pm
Focusing on relationships is always a must, and like any relationship there is a need for agreements. Like a lot of people I have found myself in bad relationships or failed expectations. Now, I use the answers to the following questions to help set an expectation for myself; does their commitment mach my own, and will the relationship be mutually beneficial? I have found by making an invested interest in my networks and more importantly the people in them, it creates a forward movement for everyone involved. Managed agreements simply create the stepping stones for each partner to use.
For more about me visit my linked in at http://www.linkedin.com/pub/5/629/226
Al Hanzal Says:
February 2nd, 2009 at 1:51 pm
Good comments about the depth of networking. My question is this: “As people get more sophisticated with social networking on the internet,i.e. Facebook, Linkedin, Twitter, how is this going to affect physical networking like BNI? You have the possibility of building an even deeper and stronger social network using these tools. Http://www.linedin.com/alhanzal
Peter G Simony Says:
February 2nd, 2009 at 2:33 pm
I can understand that in Network Marketing (MLM) the power is always to work deep, as opposed to wide.

It is because when a fire is lit below, it warms up, (motivates) all the people above because they all stand to benefit from the business being created below.

It is an interesting idea of using a similar concept in normal networking to solidify a referral relationship.

I think one way would be to look for opportunities and even go out of ones way, to help any friends, relatives and business associates of existing referral relationships.

Good Luck!
Happy International Networking Week! « The Networking Freelancer Says:
February 2nd, 2009 at 2:36 pm
[...] Are you wondering about the quality of your networking? I would recommend you read a very good yet brief article from the “Dean” of Networking, Dr. Ivan Misner. You can find this article on Success Net. <Click here> [...]
Ash Aneja Says:
February 2nd, 2009 at 2:41 pm
I think in today’s world is pays to specialize by going inch wide and mile deep. I feel if I do one thing in one way better than most the chances of success is much improved. I bring the same philosophy to networking. I used to focus on meeting 10 people and I was out the door. When I changed my focus in really getting to know at least one person at the networking event my chances of success is much improved now. The other benefit is you won’t run out of business cards so fast.
Cheri Williams Says:
February 2nd, 2009 at 2:43 pm
Thank you Dr. Misner for everything you have done for us and giving us the opportunity to grow our networks faster than ever before. But to use those connections in a profitable way is entirely up to us and timing is as important as relationship building.
Most of those other networking groups turn out to be a social event, where you would get introduced to someones single brother. Here is a suggestion that may be useful to your readers to turn them around into a sale or at minimum a referral to you or your bni members. Making you valuable to them and your members.
USE your BNI group to sell you. Ok not a new concept but this one might be. VISITORS are VERY valuable. Go to those networking events. Invite all of whom you meet to sit in on your group. Most “networking groups” are anti-sales/referral, and turn out to be 0 dollars in sales with out a LOT of time investment.
Get them to come to your BNI group, and then you and your group can sell to them with out insulting anyone.
I do this regularly, weekly even. And have heard members say, “guess who called me the other day?” and he got a sale from my visitor.
Using all of your opportunities to their fullest. Combining social networds with busines networks = My sales going through the roof. Doubleing or trippeling my BNI effect.
SO agian thank you Dr. Misner for coming up with a system that really works to build my business. and FAST.
Dave Skinner Says:
February 2nd, 2009 at 2:47 pm
I make good use of my daily network to help build depth for our local chapter. My wife and employees have all been shown the benefits that we recieve from the chapter. I asked them all to promote and support members in any way they can. This has doubled the amount of quality referrals that I give. Building depth is easy because the daily network already exists. People will gladly support members because it is a win-win situation for everyone. If everyone in our chapter has 5 in depth, we have 125 “FOCUSED” consumers helping move the group along. Now they tell two friends…
Kevin Jarchow Says:
February 2nd, 2009 at 4:45 pm
As is often quoted: “People don’t care how much you know, until they know how much you care.”

In my experience others can see right through those who seek to build relationships when the actual goal is only to create business opportunities. By building relationships that are a mile deep and an inch wide we create an infectious givers gain attitude in those around us. Helping others to be successful in business or in life, without consideration for one’s own self interest creates abundance for all concerned.

I’m on Linked-in too at: http://www.linkedin.com/in/westmichiganwealth.
Caron Egle Says:
February 2nd, 2009 at 6:28 pm
I completely agree with the importance of relationships in business (and in life!)and that quality relationships are the key to successful networking (and life!). It is particularly noteworthy because the essence of successful referal / networking is trust and the only way we truly build trust is through quality “deposits” in our relationship bank accounts. This requires authenticity and commitment, being extremely interested in the other person -valuing them, listening and supporting them acheive what they desire. Life is about quality relaionships and BNI provides a delighful forum to foster such relationships. Thank you BNI.
Jeff Top SEO Scotland Says:
February 2nd, 2009 at 7:03 pm
Hi, Thanks for this information and use of the metaphor.

I think this will be very useful for me as I have an education slot to fill this Wednesday morning.

I really appreciate this. It is actually very similar to how I get my business normally for my Internet Marketing business in Scotland.

Looking forward to reading more of your educational material.

Jeff
Lynne Keane Says:
February 2nd, 2009 at 8:17 pm
I totally agree with your observation. I am in my fifth year of sales and my fifth year in my BNI group. At non-BNI meetings, I encourage people to come see what it’s all about, especially when they complain that they don’t get business from the chamber, etc. BNI along with local training from ProActive have taught me how relationships can grow with time and effort. It has also offered me the opportunity to help educate new people in our BNI. Connecting people to others is so rewarding and definitely comes back, even if in unexpected ways.
Linda Marsh Says:
February 3rd, 2009 at 9:39 am
When we think about how we can help others, as Mr. Jarchow mentions – in our BNI connections and in other networking opportunities, a quote from Ralph Waldo Emerson illuminates this deep-rooted way of caring, “It is one of the most beautiful compensations in life… we can never help another without helping ourselves.”
Glen Townsend Says:
February 5th, 2009 at 11:36 pm
Width and Depth…key to success. I wonder, width can be compared to our waistline some is good, and healthy, unsupported, too much is unhealthy our back, heart, etc. Depth like roots, like character, like a clear spring of cool, clean water on a hot August afternoon. (Nothing more refreshing!)

Another thought. When we reach out to someone for real help in those occasional crisis, is it the wide, or deep who usually show up at 2am? Just a thought.
Daniel Borg Says:
February 6th, 2009 at 8:26 pm
An excellent metaphore!
Avi Har-Tuv, JERUSALEM,Israel Says:
February 9th, 2009 at 3:33 pm
Three practical tips to support the philosophy/idea/essence of the article:
Build quality relationships: on the first of every month, choose one member of your chapter with whom you want to deepen your relationship. Write to yourself 3 things that you can do to accomplish that (remember when you first started dating?), and write on your datebook when you are to do these. Next month add one more member- by the end of the year you”ll have 12 deeper relationships within your chapter and perhaps some new and productive habbits that will stay with you for life.
Network in new places:decide in advance how many of these you want to include in your networking in the next 12 months.A new place every month? every quarter?Trade with new people you meet an invitation to your chapter for an invitation to their organization.Focus on “build quality relationships” as in the previous tip.
Focus on others: teach yourself new tricks.could be something as small as pouring water into the glass of the people who seat next to you(if you do this on a regular basis, it will make a difference), or something more complex such as developing a positive, enthusistic way to introduce 2 people you know to each other, or improving your introduction speach when you make a referral. Try calling these members who didn’t show up to the weekly meeting, ask them about them and give them your version of what happened at the meeting, and so on.
In any case “plan your work, and work your plan”.
Peter Martino Says:
February 9th, 2009 at 11:01 pm
When considering how much money as we spend on marketing an advertising it’s a shame we don’t put as much energy into developing a deeper referral network. As a company this is one of our focusses for 2009.
Kevin Smith Says:
February 11th, 2009 at 5:12 pm
BNI works, even though I am a business coach there are so many places opportunities for business owners (and empoylees) to learn. This article has provoked my own thinking about how I network in my BNI group of 24. I am now concentrating in developing my preferred referral group, than the wider group, where the wiiFM is clearly defined as a win-win for both parties.

BNI Works!
Mary Trudelle Says:
February 18th, 2009 at 11:03 am
I was looking for new ideas to promote during my chapter ‘education’moment when I came across Avi’s comments. They were just what I was looking for and I will personally be trying them out over the next few months.
Josh Greene Says:
February 26th, 2009 at 11:10 pm
My partner and I have been building a water damage company in Tampa. FL We have been branching out to Chambers and other Association meetings and really getting involved with the groups. The “Giver’s Gain” mentality goes a long way when you really give back to the community and get involved in charitable organizations etc.
Beth Anderson Says:
March 4th, 2009 at 5:50 pm
A huge thank you to Geoff Kirkwood http://www.geoffkirkwood.com, for coming up with International Networking Week. Yes, one person CAN make a difference!
Michael Brennan Says:
January 7th, 2010 at 10:18 am
Reading the replies posted I have suddenly realised I have been spreading my roots but not going deep enough for stability. Roll on 2010 and moving into profitability, having gone through the visibility and credibility phases.

31 Responses to “Is Your Network a Mile Wide and an Inch Deep?”

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